PARODY OF PEACE

by Adedoyin Shobo

Last night I went to bed angry. Angry at what? I can't even recollect or understand. I just felt this inundation of negative vibes licking its way through my mind.
Emotions that initially seemed to have gone AWOL ages away when I was much younger steadily rising like a scene from a blood-curdling horror movie. I felt fear, indifference, restlessness, burnt out, hate and any other nasty thing the mind can imagine.

There in my room, perched in one of the dilapidated blocks in Shagari Hall of Obafemi Awolowo University, under the stupid naked light bulb dangling dangerously over my head, I tightened my eyelids to a solemn promise of a better tomorrow.

Suddenly, I’m not sure what woke me up. Maybe the sound of some ecumenical club of fellow students raining fire and thunder at the devil or the grating sound of music from some dude that wouldn’t just use his head that people go to bed late.
In midst of this confusion I dragged myself and began mulling about the day. My mind reeled indolently like a tech device transmitting data at a slow 0.01 kilobyte. I just stare into space like some zombie in a sci-fi movie under orders.  My life has been so rote since I started this damn varsity programme. I just switched on and off like some android in some distant China factory.

Slowly as the blue sky gave way to some vague whiteness, I strode off downstairs from the second floor of block F to fetch water. To my utmost dismay, the spigot and ground below it was as dry as desert. I felt like knocking the imbecilic contraption off, maybe it could also feel the pain bludgeoning my heart.

At this point, I felt a nauseous sensation in my stomach as everything around slowly reeked of putrid decadence. Probably it was the gutter just nearby, wet and green from neglect. I was sick of the hostel I lived as I took in a view of the blocks of flats around me looking like the ghosts of the former majestic self. The walls of hall literally taken apart piece by piece and under the 'rulership' of shrubs and wild life.

Still numb, it seems I momentarily floated back to the room. Of course, on getting back the power holding guys, NEPA had also cut power. I could only just hiss away the pain I felt.

Exasperated I kicked off my rubbery slipper, with beads of sweat already limning every part of my body. I thought I might go into a fit, convulsing with mouth full of whitish froth of expletives. I flung myself to bed at 7:30 am! Looking at just about everyone in the room, moving with all purposefulness even though the look on their faces and hollowness of the eye betrayed all the veneer of spiritedness.

Then without warning, Tope, one of my flatmate rang out in his usual snide manner most Nigerians are familiar with.

‘Se na like dis we go dey dey’ He said with a slur.

This was the detonator. Minutes later the little spark had turned into a full-blown debate. It was something on to the state of the country.

‘Oh Lord! the most toxic of topics’ I thought. To most of us - the flat mates, it felt like we were bitten by a black mamba.

The state of the country evoked all sorts of emotions. It didn’t need much 'dressing.'
A throng of eggheads joined in our moot court. Emotions heightened like in the tempo of a Hollywood movie blockbuster, knifing through with the precision of an arrow. ‘Boys no waste time at all’

People started talking, spewing all manner of invective at the big guns in the public glass house. Someone painfully remarked on what he thought the elected politicians should be doing and how the president’s party was faring so far – the ‘#CHANGE’ mentality.

The general consensus during this heated session among fellow students was that the country was simply and squarely doomed.

The country had been plunged headlong into a ceaseless dungeon of maternal mortality, kidnap, malfeasance, terrorism and the blatant state of a ‘failed’ state.

At once, my mind played back all the frustrations I had been made to suffer. Just two days before, we had been tongue lashed by a lecturer for refusing to pay the one thousand Naira ‘offering’ to the Department to purchase a generator to get the printout of the last semester results.

I laid there on my bed of course amused at the diverse opinions. Everyone had something to say. However, what fascinated me more was at the trailing end of the debate. To me, it still tastes like the odorous portion of madness.

“See-ee what we need to solve our problem in this country is for us to disintegrate – fair and square” Tope had said.

At that point, the room was thrown in an unfamiliar icy silence and for more than a second, it seemed all was frozen in time. It was a dead silence that betrayed the cliché - ‘Silence is Golden’

What the heck?! A voice screamed out at the back of your head. I was bewildered at the silent approval of these pundits like one obviously satiated from free food in a Lagos owambe party.

For me I felt threatened at once, a palpable fear rising. My childhood… Guilt… and If my senses perceived correctly, I could see the same fate written over these faces caught in the passion of the debate.

The convictions of Tope trumpeted resoundingly in our brains. And like convicted criminals having received a verdict of condemnation for our sins, the mood started slowly into melancholia.

All of us in the room that day were as guilty as hell. The effect of which sent a whirling, hurricane – like sensation down beneath my gut like a sucker punch.

To be continued...